Source: Jenny Ueberberg | Unsplash

I'm no newbie to online dating. I've tried practically every app out in that location, been on probably 30 or so dates (good and bad), and after a year of dating someone I met online, I'd say I've plant a lilliputian success! Romantically, dating apps can definitely work. But when it comes to friendships, do options like Bumble BFF have the same potential?

In the category of making friends, I don't exit there very much. I spent virtually of my childhood having the same all-time friends, so when we parted ways for higher, I had to basically start over. I've made some amazing friends in school, but as we all graduate and find jobs, my friendships don't seem as strong equally I in one case thought. So that leaves me, a 20-something in Chicago, a trivial lone. And if y'all know me (ENTJ all the way), I don't handle too much alone time all that well.

So I decided to accept my knack for dating apps and see if I could make some friends. My favorite dating app was always Bumble (even though I met my partner on Tinder—shh!), so I decided to encounter if Bumble BFF could alive up to the hype.

How It Works

Bumble describes its BFF feature as a "simplified way to create meaningful friendships." Sounds skillful to me!

If you've used Bumble Dating before, information technology's basically the same principle. Yous make an account with upwardly to half-dozen photos, craft a bio (it's harder than you think!), set your age, gender, and location parameters, and y'all're ready to get-go swiping! Swipe right if yous're excited to get to know them and left if you're not. Like shooting fish in a barrel peasy.

I was so proud of this bio. Cute, fun, a lil' quirky—I'one thousand going to make and so many friends.

The Profile

If you idea making a profile on a dating app was difficult, yous're in for a treat. Who knew information technology would be scarier to try to brand friends than to get a guy to want to date you?

Creating a unique bio that describes what you really desire out of these friendships is a lot harder than I expected. Everyone wants a workout buddy who will always get brunch after, someone to spotter The Bachelor with, and someone to be the Jess to their Cece—myself included! It's difficult to non sound bones and like everyone else when you truly practise desire all of those things.

The Swiping

From someone who actually got into dating apps the past few years, I'1000 slowly realizing the effect "swiping culture" tin have on us. We intendance so much well-nigh an paradigm rather than getting to know someone. Then I made it my mission to swipe right on mostly everyone. I based everything on the bio and nada on looks. Let me exist honest: Information technology wasn't all that like shooting fish in a barrel! We're and then trained to focus on photos and how people wait on these apps, but I knew if I was going to build friendships, I wanted them to exist assault a foundation of mutual interest rather than outward appearance.

Being in a large city, I never felt like I was "running out of options" when I was swiping. When I originally set my location parameters to only a few miles, there were for certain less, but as I increased it to bridge basically the whole metropolis of Chicago, I was in just about an countless puddle of potential brunch buddies.

Yet, I got to a bespeak after a while where I pretty much swiped right on everyone regardless of if it seemed like nosotros'd be a skillful fit. I just wanted to make friends!

I was so excited to discuss my love for Trader Joe's—and we never spoke again.

The extent of this human relationship… womp womp.

The Matches

Yeah, this is where my experience begins to dwindle a little fleck from apps dedicated to dating. I got hardly any matches. If I did match (hallelujah!), I either got no response dorsum or we said 2 things and they stopped responding.

I noticed a lot of my matches were looking for roommates or were promoters at clubs and wanted me to "become a group of girls together" for a costless table and drinks. While I am always down for a gratis table and drinks, I feel like if I already had a "group of girls," I probably wouldn't be on Bumble BFF. Maybe just me though!

Practise other women simply not accept Bumble BFF seriously, or am I that utterly unswipe-correct-able?

When I Started Feeling Like Giving Up

Not coming together every bit many people (or anyone really) started to get to me. The rejection was honestly worse than dating because I was just looking for someone to hang out and accept fun with!  After looking at what felt like hundreds of photos of girls in their cap and gown from graduation, on some vacation with their boyfriends, or sipping a mimosa (Bumble BFF girlslove brunch!), I started feeling like I didn't measure upwardly. What about me makes all these girls not want to be my friend? Is my bio not creative plenty? Do I not have enough photos that brand me expect cute and fun? What am I doing incorrect?

I started chirapsia myself up over not meeting anyone that I started feeling like a friendless loser who was destined to sit at home and spotter every new Netflix pic lonely. I got into a comparison mindset, thinking that I needed to have a contour more like her or her, and then, I'd brand friends. I almost asked a photographer I know to fix a photo shoot so I could have meliorate pictures on my profile. That's when I knew I just had to finish.

I stopped worrying about people on the internet for a second. People go uncomfortable and bored with dating apps all the fourth dimension, so why is it so weird that I'grand feeling the same way toward a friend app? I learned that my worth isn't derived from people "matching" with me on an app, and I take an entire life full of friendships ahead of me. Women have found bridesmaids and best friends without Bumble BFF, and then I recollect I'll be merely fine for right now.

I started making friends at work. I exchanged numbers with a woman in my yoga class (This was a assuming motion that I was very afraid to do, but at present nosotros're going to another class together!). I besides started taking myself on all those friend dates I was hoping to become from Bumble BFF. I took myself to the movies (everyone needs to come across A Unproblematic Favor ASAP), I sat at a coffee store without my laptop for once, and I made brunch for myself at abode instead (talk about a money saver!). I also encouraged myself to reach out to people I normally wouldn't. My photographer friend and I did hang out, but the only pictures involved were the ones nosotros took of our cheese board.

Last Thoughts

My Bumble BFF experience wasn't exactly what I was expecting. While I didn't really make any new friends from the app, information technology got me in a mindset to accept chances and come across people IRL, so I can't say the experience was totally unsuccessful. I don't remember there's whatsoever harm in trying an app to meet friends, but I wouldn't recommend going into it thinking yous'll meet your soul sister.

I'd too suggest remembering who yous are through the procedure. Rejection, in whatsoever form, is then difficult to deal with, and it can really impact how we view ourselves. Don't let a bunch of people on an app determine your worth. That unspoken confidence might even assist y'all score a few friend dates along the way!